Wednesday, April 25, 2012

#1 Cardinal Rule in Dating

The world is changing but unfortunately men have not! Don't be fooled into believing that because women are equals in society means that the rules of dating have changed. The biggest and most important rule that has been true since we swung in trees, is let the men be the pursuer. I know it's not really fair, our society should be progressive enough for women to chase after men. 

Reasons why women should let men pursue 

1. The pursuer falls for the other person faster. We all have experienced this phenomenon when we become interested in a guy and chase, and the harder we work to get his attention the more we want him. The funny thing is once a person gets locked into chasing they become attracted because of the challenge and intrigue more than the qualities of the person. So, put this to your advantage and make your crush work for you instead of you work for him.

2. Men want to catch the big fish. It's elementary and childish but extremely true. A man wants nothing more than to have something that other people will be envious about. Be that an expensive car, high paying job, and or a special woman. If the chase to the prize is too easy, a guy will instinctively believe that the fish he caught is actually a minnow. A woman is like a club! Women spend thousands of dollars on shoes, make-up, jewelry, spas, nails, and so on. Not to mention the time and effort it takes to look pretty every day. There are some clubs which let everyone in for free without restrictions or payment. And then there are the swanky and highly sought after clubs that everyone wants to be apart of but only select few get in.

Not all women leave the chase up to the man. But that makes it easier for the rest of us to bait a successful man. Let other woman make the mistake of being too forward and seeming too desperate. Letting the man pursue you and making him work for your heart/attention/love/time makes the thrill of winning you all the more sweeter. The beauty about being pursued is that you get to choose and thus you have the power. 

It's easy to attract a guy but the art of holding his attention is much harder

The Little Black Book of Being Pursued 

1. He initiates all calls and texts for the first 3 weeks! No exceptions! Not even if your Grandma dies!!!

2. Between week 4 and month 3 the ratio of initiated calls can now switch to 1/3. For every three calls or texts he initiates you can initiate one. EVEN if you're exclusive!

3. When you aren't exclusively dating you're allowed to date other men. Even if he's 'your soulmate'. A guy was never scared away because other men were chasing her. It will make him want to secure you faster. BUT don't talk or brag about the other guys.

4. When a guy invites you to a party or get together and you aren't exclusively dating make yourself stand out. Be lively, make new friends. Don't hang on him! 

5. Don't give everything away at once. Let there be mysteries to be discovered. 

6. Have a poker face in the early stages of a relationship. Don't give it away that you're crazy about him just yet. Not until he reveals it first. 

7. Mimic his movements. If he seems to push away, take a few steps back. Girls make the mistake of turning into the pursuer immediately when the guy starts acting aloof. If he likes you he'll come back. If not then well NEXT

8. Because you're the pursued keep your eyes and heart open to how you feel about him. It's your job to see if this guy is worth dating before things get serious. 

9. Make him work around your schedule. Don't drop all your plans with your friends because your recent crush asked you out. If a guy truly likes you he will make time for you. Simple as that. No exceptions. 

10. Don't be won so easily. If he puts a lot of love/attention/affection into you like a part time job then he's falling for you. If he sees you once a week and you make it easy for him then he won't be so smitten. 

11. In the first year of exclusive dating keep a gradual incline of 'firsts' and discoveries. Don't do all the firsts in the first few weeks (first meeting with parents, first party thrown together, first trip, first 'I love you', etc). 

12. It's not about tricking a guy but keeping things interesting long enough for YOU and HIM to figure out if things could work. Taking things slow protects your heart from un-needed heart break and un-deserving jerks. 

*No sources were used in the making of this post except for the images from Yahoo*

Happy Wednesday!!

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